Funny Quotes
84 Funny Jokes of All Time Laugh Out Loud
In a hurry for the best jokes for kids? We’ve got you covered for hours’ worth of funny jokes. Oh, and the majority of them are unique! Parents will need little to no explanation for these hilarious jokes, but you’ll want to join in on the fun anyway. Many of these, ranging from corny and silly jokes to knock-knock jokes and beyond, have been sent to us by both young and old readers. (Insert dad jokes here!) There are also clean jokes, back-to-school jokes, toddler jokes, and printable lunchbox jokes. We also have the best minute-to-win-it games for those who want to take the fun to the next level.
It’s difficult to find someone who doesn’t enjoy a good funny joke. After all, there’s something about a super cliché and predictable one-liner that can elicit a big belly laugh from even the most cynical of people. Furthermore, having a few corny jokes on hand for when you need a pickup line or an icebreaker at work is an invaluable asset.
Funny Jokes
#1. “How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.”
#2. “Why was the broom late to school? It over-swept!”
#3. “What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music.”
#4. “What kind of pizza do dogs eat? Pup-eroni pizza!”
#5. “What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.”
#6. “What does a triceratops sit on? On its tricera-bottom.”
#7. “A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?””
#8. “How are false teeth like stars? They come out at night.”
#9. “How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience.”
#10. “How do you organize a space party? You planet.”
#11. “How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a complete nut!”
#12. “Why was the coach yelling at the vending machine? He wanted his quarter back.”
#13. “Why did the teacher have a sack full of birdseed? For her parrot-teacher conferences.”
#14. “Which side of a cow is the hairiest? The outside!”
#15. “Why do vampires seem sick? They’re always coffin.”
#16. “What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.”
#17. “How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.”
#18. “What is a computer’s favorite snack? Computer chips.”
#19. “What did the elf learn in school? The elf-abet.”
#20. “Where do cows go on December 31st? A moo year’s eve party.”
#21. “What has three letters and starts with gas? A car.”
#22. “Why are elevator jokes the funniest? Because they work on so many levels.”
#23. “What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.”
#24. “How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.”
#25. “What did the full glass say to the empty glass? You look drunk.”
#26. “Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a-salted.”
#27. “What’s a ninja’s favorite type of shoes? Sneakers.”
#28. “What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One’s pretty heavy and the other’s a little lighter.”
#29. “Why are ghosts terrible liars? Because you can see right through them.”
#30. “What kind of nut doesn’t like money? Cash ew.”
#31. “What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi.”
#32. “What is the strongest animal in the sea? Mussels.”
#33. “Why didn’t the lamp sink? It was too light.”
#34. “What’s the stinkiest planet? Poopiter.”
#35. “What building in New York has the most stories? The public library.”
#36. “What type of key opens a banana? A mon-key.”
#37. “What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.”
#38. “What animal is always at a baseball game? A bat.”
#39. “What do you call a famous turtle? A shell-ebrity!”
#40. “What’s black and white and goes round and round? A penguin in the washing machine.”
#41. “Why don’t we see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.”
#42. “What kind of chicken is the funniest? A comedi-hen!”
#43. “A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie was everywhere.”
#44. “What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas!”
#45. “What’s the best smelling insect? A deodor-ant.”
#46. “What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear.”
#47. “Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his leg muscles so much as a kid? He was a little Thor.”
#48. “I used to hate facial hair…but then it grew on me.”
#49. “Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake.”
#50. “What did the buffalo say when his kid went to college? Bison.”
#51. “What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.”
#52. “Why do bowling pins have such a hard life? They’re always getting knocked down.”
#53. “If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims.”
#54. “What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A Maybe.”
#55. “What did the fisherman say to the magician? “Pick a cod, any cod.””
#56. “What do you call a sleeping T-Rex? A dino-snore!”
#57. “I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.”
#58. “Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.”
#59. “What do you call a ghost’s true love? A ghoul-friend.”
#60. “Why did the farmer ride his horse into town? Because it was too heavy to carry.”
#61. “What did one hat say to the other? You wait here, I’ll go on ahead.”
#62. “What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!”
#63. “Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.”
#64. “What did the banana say to the dog? Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.”
#65. “What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I’m dressing.”
#66. “What did the pirate say when he turned Aye matey.”
#67. “How can you tell if an ant is a boy or a girl? They’re all girls! If they were boys, they’d be uncles.”
#68. “What was the first animal in space? The cow that jumped over the moon.”
#69. “What kind of pictures do turtles take? Shell-fies.”
#70. “What do you feed an alligator? Anything it wants!”
#71. “Why was the student’s report card wet? It was below C level.”
#72. “What do you call a dinosaur that crashes his car? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.”
#73. “How many months have days? All of them!”
#74. “Did you hear the one about the roof? Never mind, it’s over your head.”
#75. “What falls in winter but never gets hurt? Snow.”
#76. “What did the snowman ask the other snowman? “Do you smell carrots?””
#77. “Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7-8-9.”
#78. “Why are penguins socially awkward? Because they don’t know how to break the ice.”
#79. “What’s white and can’t climb trees? A fridge.”
#80. “Why don’t sharks eat clowns? Because they taste funny.”
#81. “Why did the M&M go to school? Because she wanted to be a Smartie.”
#82. “Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants while he played? In case he got a hole in one.”
#83. “I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.”
#84. “How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree? By the bark.”
Read More
- 80 Funny Birthday Memes for Her | Happy Birthday Meme for Girlfriend
- Happy 40th Birthday Memes: Funny 40th Birthday Memes for Him/Her Turning 40
- 72 Funny Valentine’s Day Memes That Be My Valentine Memes
- 80 Funny Valentine Memes To Make You Laugh For Hilarious Valentines Memes
- 60 Angry Memes For Those With A Lot Of So Mad – Best Funny Pictures
You may like
Subscribe to Blog via Email
Categories
Trending
- Relationships Quotes10 months ago
337+ Relationship Quotes And Sayings
- Good Morning Quotes10 months ago
100 Good Morning Quotes with Beautiful Images
- Quotes10 months ago
300 Winnie The Pooh Quotes To Fill Your Heart With Joy
- Quotes8 months ago
35 Deep Heart Touching One Sided Love Quotes for Her
- Good Morning Quotes1 year ago
57 of the Good Morning Quotes And Images Positive Energy for Good Morning
- Good Morning Quotes10 months ago
35 of the Good Morning Quotes And Images Positive Energy for Good Morning
- Life Quotes10 months ago
284 Broken Heart Quotes About Breakup And Heartbroken Sayings
- Motivational Quotes10 months ago
265 Motivational & Inspirational Quotes About Life to Succeed