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Funny Quotes

TOP 25 Funny Quotes (of 500)

Funny quotes and sayings “It’s Always Funny listening to someone lie when you Already know the Truth.”. Here more best collection of TOP 25 Funny Quotes (of 500).


funny quotes about life lessons ” Being Unique is Better… Than Being Perfect..” funny life quotes

“Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.” – Billy Sunday

“Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.” – Ellen DeGeneres

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” ― Mark Twain

“They love their hair because they’re not smart enough to love something more interesting.” ― John Green

“When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” ― Cathy Guisewite


Oh Shit! again I am in love.”

“The moment the door opened I knew an ass-kicking was inevitable. Whether I’d be giving it or receiving it was still a bit of a mystery.” ― Rachel Vincent

“To answer your question, you want me because I’m made of awesome.” ― Gena Showalter

“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.” -Ellen DeGeneres

“I’m not the smartest fellow in the world, but I can sure pick smart colleagues.” ― Franklin D. Roosevelt

“If we’re mad, we’re mad in large numbers, at least larger than yours.” ― Shannon Hale


 I’ve taken up Photography because it’s the only hobby were you can shoot people and cut their heads off without Going to Jail..”

“A real girl isn’t perfect and a perfect girl isn’t real.” ― Harry Styles

“Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.” ― Marian Keyes

“Cultivate your curves – they may be dangerous but they won’t be avoided.”
― Mae West

“When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.” ― Lily Tomlin

“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.” ― Rick Riordan


“Shutup! I Love You, OK? ”

“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” ― Winston S. Churchill

“If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?” ― Jerry Seinfeld

“That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.” ― George Carlin

“Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.” ― Yogi Berra,

“Did you see that dress?” “I saw the dress.” “Did you like it?” He didn’t answer. I took that as a yes. “Am I going to endanger my reputation if I wear it to the dance?” When he spoke, I could barely hear him. “You’ll endanger the school.” I smiled and fell asleep.” ― Richelle Mead


“My best Friends is the One. Who brings out the best in me.”


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